I intended to be active on my blog for the New Year. On the very same day of my last post, a flaming arrow coming from the pits of hell was sent my way intended as a kill shot. I was completely blindsided. In the physical realm, a stab wound takes time to heal and the same can be said about emotional wounds.
Six days into my ordeal, I received an unexpected oversized package. The mailman left it by the front door without warning. I had no idea how long it had been sitting there. My son initially thought it was some of my sister’s stuff she wanted to get rid of, but I knew exactly what it was. As I shook the package, the shards of glass made noise. It was a huge painting I had given to her eighteen years ago.
I was careful to remove it from the box because of the huge shards of glass. None of the big ones cut me, but ironically, the one I did not deem as a threat stabbed me on my finger and made me bleed. It was painless.
The painting was a timely reminder that pain is fleeting. I had buried some of the emotional turmoil and creating was a way to distract myself from the fact that at the time, I was unmarried, pregnant with my son and facing a future that looked uncertain. As I look at the painting, even though I still remember the details of what I went through, it no longer wielded any painful emotions out of me.
As I completely removed the broken glass, for the most part, the essence of the painting remained intact. The big shards did not puncture any part of the canvas.
Restoration is needed since the pronounced paint strokes became stuck to the glass. Some of the colors were inevitably removed, but it can be retouched.
We can heed to the warnings but we are not guaranteed complete avoidance of the shards of life coming from the choices we make, its consequences and unforeseen circumstances.
To the hurting and those who are suffering the loss of a loved one via death or a betrayal, there are those days where the best thing you can do is just stay on your bed and grieve. It’s okay to grieve. God is so merciful He sees what we need and if it is time that we need to heal, there’s no need to force yourself to bounce back too quickly. This brokenness is indeed painful, oftentimes too much to bear and none of us would have any part of it if it can be avoided, but embracing the reality no matter how shattering it is is the only pathway to healing.
These words pertaining to the Savior (Luke 4:16-21) continually bring comfort to me…
“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me,
because the Lord has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,
to proclaim freedom for the captives
and release from darkness for the prisoners,
2 to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor
and the day of vengeance of our God,
to comfort all who mourn,
3 and provide for those who grieve in Zion—
to bestow on them a crown of beauty
instead of ashes,
the oil of joy
instead of mourning,
and a garment of praise
instead of a spirit of despair.
They will be called oaks of righteousness,
a planting of the Lord
for the display of his splendor.”
Isaiah 61:1-3
As I cling to this promise,
“And God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.”
Revelation 21:4
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
Matthew 5:4
How can being broken even bring a blessing? It is during these painful moments that the beacon of salvation shines the brightest. He’s there to bind us up.
Jesus… Call on HIM.